Renee    : Hello, everybody!

Lucy      : Oh, hi! (Renee: Hi!) Welcome to Renee’s and my beach pad. (Renee: Yeah.) It’s summer, (Renee: You’re all welcomed.) and we’re relaxing in our courtyard outback.

Renee    : Yeah. It’s what we do everyday.

Lucy      : It’s a little noisy because for some reason the neighbor has turned on her television the first time (Renee: Right.) in three months. I think, she saw the cameras and…

Renee    : Decided she would…

Lucy      : She just had to watch Days of Our Lives.

Renee    : We have the ocean on the other side of you guys.

Lucy      : And a pond to our right.

Renee    : And a little Jacuzzi underneath.

Lucy      : And a little Jacuzzi which keeps, um, making farting noises. So it’s not us.

Renee    : Right.

Lucy      : It’s the Jacuzzi.

Renee    : Sure. That’s what they all say. So anyway, this is us. We’re gonna have a little, uh, now that the boys are all asleep. (Lucy: a little review) We’re gonna have a little…

Lucy      : A little girl talk.

Renee    : Well if Renee can figure out how to—oh my God. Turn it up. There’s no sound?

Gab_TV : You’ve got to take me with you. Teach me everything you know. [Sins of the Past clip]

Lucy      : And I did.

Xe_TV   : Why? [Sins of the Past clip]

Gab_TV : Did you see the guy they want me to marry? [Sins of the Past clip]

Renee    : You did, yeah. Little that we know.

Lucy      : Yeah. That was all over by the first season.

Renee    : What was it? What was over by the first season?

Lucy      : Me teaching you everything I know.

Renee    : Right. I don’t know, I think it carried on for five seasons. Little bits and pieces.

Lucy      : That’s right. She sucked my brains out slowly.

Renee    : I did. I picked you head.

Lucy      : That’s right. Picked my…

Renee    : Do you remember filming this?

Lucy      : I do, actually.

Renee    : I do too.

Lucy      : I remember meeting you that first week. And Renee would look at me like, ‘ohh..’

Renee    : ‘You’re a goddess!’

Lucy      : And I’m going, ‘don’t do that!’

Renee    : Yeah. You were my idol, yeah. That was so funny. You know, I had an interview once and, um, “once”… And, um, the guy said, um, ‘you know, you really just look at Lucy with, um, such esteem and you just really looked at her like she’s, you know, this icon.’ I was like, ‘yeah. Yeah, I do.’ You know? It was really kind of funny. It was really bizarre, actually. (Lucy: Well, that’s over.) Yeah I know.

Lucy      : By the 5th season she’s punching me in the stomach.

Renee    : Yeah. I got—yeah.

Lucy      : Telling me to shut up, and directing me.

Renee    : Yeah. There you go. Go figure! I came back to reality. Now you’ve got me (Lucy: ‘Do it again, Lucy!’) out of pencil, right?

Lucy      : Yeah.

Renee    : Yeah. I just wanna make sure.

Gab_TV : I love to study maps and place names. So what route do you usually take? [Sins of the Past clip]

Xe_TV   : Don’t even think about it. [Sins of the Past clip]

Lucy      : We’re so bored. In Thrace. Or wherever we are.

Renee    : We’re bored or boring?

Lucy      : You were so—you were so bored in Acidopholis—what was your placed called?

Renee    : Right. Yeah. Um, um…

Lucy      : Amphipolis

Renee    : Amphipolis. Bored and betrothed.

Lucy      : Yeah, ‘we used to read maps. And the telephone book.’

Renee    : ‘All I did was read books. I had no social life. Except for the man that I—’

Lucy      : Those guys you kept killing. Marrying and killing.

Renee    : That came later, yeah. Ooh. (Lucy: *gasps* Mmh?) See? You were the one.

Lucy      : We both looked like chipmunks in those days, didn’t we?

Renee    : Chipmunks, young, naïve. Little did we know what was to come.

Lucy      : Bat-faced. Rolly-polly little bat-faced girls.

Renee    : ‘Hmm. How can I join her?’ What’s next? Oops, what’ve I done? Lucy’s big foot’s in the way.

Lucy      : It’s my feet! Nothing can get around my feet. No signal.

Renee    : No signal.

Lucy      : I need Nextel. The guy on the donkey walking around my feet.

Xena fights [The Reckoning clip]

Renee    : Yeah. You should just handcuff your cell on your toe. Who needs Verizon?

Lucy      : Ooh my armpits!

Gabrielle gets hit by Xena [The Reckoning clip]

Lucy      : Oh!

Renee    : Whoa! How could you?

Lucy      : What’d she do that for?

Renee    : ‘How—‘ You know what I remember filming that?

Lucy      : I don’t remember that at all. (Renee: Do you?) No.

Renee    : I do. I said—I remember, uh, we filmed all your fights and then we turned around with, uh, getting my reaction and the hit..? (Lucy: Yeah?) I remember saying to you, Lucy, um, ‘just look at me.’ You know, ‘oh, no, no, no, I didn’t look at you on my reverse.’ You know? I said, ‘no, no, it doesn’t matter. Just look at me.’ ‘Cause just seeing your eyes and you would create a reaction that was completely appropriate to, you know, being that hurt sort of thing, you know? You don’t remember that? I remember that. It was a long time ago.

Lucy      : I didn’t remember that Gabrielle got hurt. Was she hurt because…

Renee    : It was just you and the rage of the fight and she happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. It was a complete accident.

Lucy      : You know, I think it was because Xena hadn’t really learned to care about somebody yet… (Renee: Oh, I think—) that she developed, you know, through her love for Gabrielle.

Renee    : Do you? I think that’s true.

Lucy      : She’s just, you know—I mean, she never had to look after somebody before. (Renee: Right.) It was just her against the baddies.

Renee    : And little ol’ Gabrielle, you know? (Lucy: The little young Gabrielle.) She was at the wrong place and the wrong time. The kicks were just a bit off for Xena that day.

Lucy      : Yeah. That’s right. ‘Cause she was—had half a brain worrying about the chipmunk.

Renee    : Exactly. (Lucy: Right.) The Chipmunk scenario.

Lucy      : Alvin.

Renee    : Alvin?

Lucy      : Alvin and the Chipmunks.

Renee    : Yeah.

Gab_TV : I trust you. I never thought for a moment you meant to hurt me. [The Reckoning clip]

Xe_TV   : Well, I owe you. Thanks. [The Reckoning clip]

Gab_TV : I owe you, too. [The Reckoning clip]

Lucy      : And for the rest of your life.

Gabrielle punches Xena [The Reckoning clip]

Xe_TV   : What was that? [The Reckoning clip]

Gab_TV : Payback. For hitting me. [The Reckoning clip]

Xe_TV   : Feel better? [The Reckoning clip]

Gab_TV : I think I broke my hand. But—I do feel better. [The Reckoning clip]

Xe_TV   : Good. [The Reckoning clip]

Renee    : Actually I remember… (Lucy: That was good.) I remember when I was try—uh, trying to learn how to hit a hit for one of the fights or something..? And I was, um, showing you how to do it and I hit your hand… and it felt like hitting a wall. I just remember that. So that was very real.

Lucy      : Well thanks, Renee.

Renee    : Yeah, that’s okay. I just want you to know.

Lucy      : Look, we got screaming from this direction screamed. She’s only watching back-to-back Xenas. (Renee: That’s what she—she should join us!) And they would be—it’s a marathon. Those people shrieking. I better just go see him (Julius).

Renee    : Yeah. Hang on.

Xena hugs Gabrielle [Death in Chains clip]

Lucy      : This is me trying to nut out how Xena should react to those—as you try to feel out your character, you know?

Renee    : Right. ‘Never had a young girl thrust herself into me and look for comfort.’

Lucy      : Yeah. Threw her to my bosoms.

Xena hugs Gabrielle [Death in Chains clip]

Lucy      : Aww. Look at your little face.

Renee    : The tears streaming… Well, you know. (Lucy: It was good.) It was quite obvious. (Lucy: It was a good scene.) Gabrielle looked up to Xena so... (Julius: I love you mom.) you know, it’s true.

Julius     : I love you, mom.

Renee    : And Gabrielle loves Xena. Lucy, like, a moment.

Lucy      : Oh, my nerves!

Gab_TV : What do you think of this one? [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Xe_TV   : It’s lovely. What’s it for? [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Renee    : What is it?

Gab_TV : It’s a walking stick. [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Lucy      : What’s wrong with your leg?

Gab_TV : You walk with it, (Renee: That’s how I walk) you can lean on it if you need a rest, you can kill nasty little critters if you wanna lie down. [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Lucy      : Kill, kill, Gabrielle!

Renee    : That’s the introduction of the staff.

Lucy      : Faster, pussycat!

Renee    : I cannot remember that at all.

Lucy      : *gasps* You’re right! (Renee: I have no—) Look at that!

Renee    : I have no recollection of how the staff came into being. So that’s it. I started walking funny with the hop, and…

Lucy      : And Xena put on 40 pounds, and the rest is history. It’s hilar—it’s like all that fun living with Gabrielle. Gabrielle’s cooking for—she’s got refreshments for 15.

Renee    : Gabrielle and her mutton recipe. Oh, no.

Lucy      : That’s right. Rub it down with lard.

Renee    : That’s not true. Stop it, you’re funny. Okay. Anyway… That was a good hit.

Xe_TV   : Hm. Not bad. [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Renee    : Very good.

Gab_TV : Or you could do that. Yeah. [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Lucy      : I heard an ADR line there.

Renee    : What was that?

Lucy      : ‘Not bad,’ you know. Unless I was speaking into my costume. Speaking into my cleavage. That, um…

Renee    : It was too clear? (Lucy: Yeah, yeah. Somehow…) For walking away?

Lucy      : I guess it was where we were just learning to do looping, you know?

Renee    : Right. Um, it’s funny because—

Lucy      : Why did you bring your son here? He’s a P-E-S-T.

 

***

 

Lucy      : You wanna see the next one?

Julius     : Yeah.

Renee    : Okay.

Lucy      : Okay, come on! Everytime it goes blue, we’re just gonna have a little talk. And we’ll see another piece of Xena and Gabrielle. (Renee: I bet—) That’s so cool. You’re gonna get caught up in the education.

Gabrielle does the Amazon dance [Hooves & Harlots clip]

Renee    : You know what’s funny about this? This is the first time that I had to dance as Gabrielle, and I couldn’t decide if I should really try to dance well or just, you know, have two left feet.

Lucy      : Suck?

Renee    : Yeah, you know. And I just though, ‘ah, you gotta have fun with it!’ So I try to do the goofiest things I could find and (Lucy: Oh, you’re a good dancer.) they never asked me to dance again, what, for 3-4 years after that. That was funny.

Lucy      : Then they had you dancing every other weekend.

Renee    : Yeah. At the end.

Lucy      : Oh, look. You can’t dance bad if you try it. It’s good.

Renee    : Thanks, Luce.

Lucy      : I can’t dance well if I try.

Renee    : Come on. That’s not true. I’ve seen you dance. I’ve seen you dance, yeah… with friends.

Lucy      : Yeah, yeah. That’s right. Not on the show.

Renee    : The forgiving.

Lucy      : Don’t give me choreography.

Renee    : Here’s a better scene.

Gab_TV : You wanna talk about it? [Callisto clip]

Renee    : I remember this. This is so great.

Lucy      : The smell.

Xe_TV   : It was just another village to conquer. Nothing out of the ordinary. Fire broke out and I don’t know if it was one of my men or just an accident. There was a strong wind and those flames just swipe through that town like a wave of death. The people were huddled in their houses ‘cause they were afraid of my army. That was one time that my army was— [Callisto clip]

Lucy      : You know what’s horrifying about this as you watch it, all those years ago doing that scene, and then knowing how the series ends, and you go, ‘how many villages did she burn to the ground? How many—‘ you know? (Renee: Right.) ‘…souls she’s responsible for?’ And, uh, of course those things were written with no (Renee: idea of what would—) precedence of what (Renee: Absolutely.) would be written, not from, you know, producers or the writers’ point of views but—just kind of evolved—but, um, it’s kinda shocking to see these (Renee: To see how bad she was?), and you go, ‘hmm. No wonder…’ (Renee: You carried it, though.) ‘cause that all fans who’d watched it had put all those pieces together and we’re filling in the blanks the whole time and we were just kind of *pants* (Renee: Trying to keep up.) running to keep up with produced stories. But, um… yeah. No wonder… no wonder people took things so personally.

Renee    : I often wondered after this scene what you had experienced made you connect with that so strongly. (Lucy: I know right then it was…) Because it’s not—it’s not a dialogue that you just say without, (Lucy: No... it was—)without understanding that experience.

Lucy      : No, it was a, um, holocaust thing. Because… I don’t know where I got the idea about the smell, but—smell is such an evocative sense too, but there must’ve been this terrible smell about human beings burning, you know? And nobody ever talks about that, but, um, perhaps I’d heard a holocaust survivor mention it or… I don’t know. I don’t know where I got it from, but it was specifically a holocaust reference in my mind when I was—that was the image I was using, yeah.

Renee    : Geez.

Lucy      : And the thing about doing a scene where you’ve got—if you’re drawing on something like the Holocaust, you really gotta keep a lid on it, don’t you? So tight, ‘cause otherwise you’re getting (Renee: Oh, yeah.) blub all over the place and not finish the scene and not serve the characters and, um…

Renee    : But you know what’s interesting about this show, um, is that because the reality is not close to home, you know, it’s not something you experience every day, so you had to find heightened (Lucy: Right.) aspects of your life or (Lucy: Or history to draw on.) history to draw on just to find a way to connect with these people and what they’re going through.

Lucy      : Yeah, to try and make it real that you’re talking about cutting people’s head as often.

Renee    : Right. And that thousands of people are dying, you know?

Lucy      : Yeah. Of course, since September 11 that’s become all too real.

Renee    : Then everybody could understand that.

Lucy      : Yeah. But…

Renee    : But before that, how do you, you know, because our generation hasn’t lived through a huge war like that (Lucy: Right.) to, um, yeah... just try to find these things to make it real.

Gab_TV : Somebody has to say no to this lust for revenge. [Callisto clip]

Xe_TV   : That is so hard to do. [Callisto clip]

Gab_TV : You did it. When your village was destroyed you were infected with blood lust. But you overcame it. [Callisto clip]

Xe_TV   : I was lucky. I saw what I’d become and I was able to turn it around. But if something happened to mother, or Hercules, or you… I might do just the same. [Callisto clip]

Renee    : That’s a first.

Lucy      : I forgot that Hercules was such a player (Renee: Right.) early on, because (Renee: He was one of your best friends.) after the second season, you know, you kinda never give him another thought. But…

Renee    : Right.

Lucy      : Um, that’s right. (Renee: But he was more important than Gabrielle.) He was like…

Gab_TV : …but with forgiveness, [Callisto clip]

Xe_TV   : Don’t go changing, Gabrielle. I like you just the way you are. Get some sleep. [Callisto clip]

Gab_TV : No. No, you promise me. [Callisto clip]

Xe_TV   : I promise. [Callisto clip]

Renee    : I was naïve, though. I mean, I fit right into that.

Lucy      : It’s a scream! (Renee: Boy…) But you see, if we have had done that, like, in the last season (Renee: We woulda just laugh) it woulda been cut—yea, you would’ve laughed. (Renee: I would’ve laughed.) We wouldn’t have held it together. (Renee: No.) We would just go, ‘blaahh…’

Renee    : Yeah. But—

Lucy      : But it was really unexpected to see that in the final cut.

Renee    : Yeah. But we came from two different places—the characters, you know? I was naïve about the whole world view and you had a—obviously different idea. Reality. That was funny though. The other thing about this which was interesting is it was the first time that, wasn’t it TJ that was directing this? I believe so. (Lucy: This is Callisto.) Because he—he… it was TJ, then. I’m pretty sure. Yeah, I think so. Anyway, uh…

Lucy      : I think he did Return of Callisto.

Renee    : I think he did this.

Lucy      : Where she goes down the, um, sand... hole.

Renee    : You know why I remember, because, um, the fire. They put the fire right in front of the camera and it was um, on a boat on a dolly? So they’re moving back and forth which was very unusual, we’ve never done that before and I thought…

Lucy      : That Mike Levine thing?

Renee    : Might’ve been.

Lucy      : Alright. Anyway…

Renee    : Anyway, it was just really interesting that the production value to me just went up a notch again that it—suddenly it had this feature film quality that… they were putting together these shots (Lucy: See, you would notice things like that.) that were so elaborate. I thought it was interesting.

Audio from Is There A Doctor In the House

Lucy      : That’s nice, eh? That was nice.

Renee    : It’s funny.

Lucy      : ‘Doctor’?

Renee    : Um-hm.

Lucy      : Andrew Binns (referring to Hippocrates on Xena)

Xe_TV   : She’s not dead. I wouldn’t let her. Come on Gabrielle, wake up. Come on, wake up. Come on, wake up! You’re scaring me, wake up! Wake up! Gabrielle, breathe! Come on, come on, breathe! Breathe! Maybe she just needs air. I need to get some air in her lungs. *Xena does CPR* Come on, breathe! [Is There A Doctor In the House clip]

Hpcrtes  : Xena, stop it. She’s dead now. She’s in a much better place. [Is There A Doctor In the House clip]

Xe_TV   : Get out of my way! You don’t know anything! Don’t you listen to him. Gabrielle, I know you’re in there, prove it. You can show him. Come on. Wake up and breathe! You never ran from anything in your whole life. Come on, fight! Fight!! [Is There A Doctor In the House clip]

Renee    : Who would’ve thought?

Lucy      : Was this third season?

Renee    : It was first season. The end of the first. Second? The end of the first.

Lucy      : End of the first?

Renee    : Yeah. That was really the first time you showed how much you loved Gabrielle in that way, don’t you think?

Lucy      : Um, I don’t know if it was the first time, but yeah, (Renee: But it came through so raw.) this is a major… and um, I remember this was, like, the third take (Renee: Oh, really?) TJ always said, ‘Lucy’s a third-take-girl.’

Renee    : Really?

Lucy      : Yeah. And, um, so... and as the takes go on you get more—kind of desperate in a way, because (Renee: You don’t know if you could do it again) you don’t know what—yeah, you don’t know if you could do it again, you don’t know exactly what they want, why are they going again, how can you… So, (Renee: Yeah.) you sort of surrender to that, um…

Renee    : It’ll be just like TJ to push you just a little bit further. (Lucy: Yeah.) ‘I wanna do it again.’

Lucy      : Um, (Renee: And I rememb—) and this terrified me, this. Really exhilarating and to—when you read the script and you go, ‘whoa! This is gonna be a biggie to pull off properly.’

Renee    : ‘How do I do the scene?’

Lucy      : But…

Renee    : I remember you wondering if Xena should cry. Do you remember that? We were talking about it. We must’ve been talking about it some time before the scene and you were wondering because she’s so stoic and she’s seen such… you know, uh, horrible events in her life. (Lucy: Right.) The death and… (Lucy: Right 5x) would she be that connected to one little girl, would she be (Lucy: Right.) that heartfelt about the death of one girl as opposed to all these other people that she—passed through her life, and… I remember that, so…

Lucy      : But you would ha—the strongest choice is to say yes, and to just (Renee: Love.) go with it. Just give in to love.

Renee    : Give in to love.

Lucy      : Okay. It was a good scene, I’m really— (Renee: It was a great scene.) I was always really proud of this. Great forefront.

Renee    : You know what was really weird about this later? I think it was the fifth season… they were digitizing us for the flying of the Fallen Angel angels, and they were trying to digitize your face and they chose this scene of all scenes. I happened to see it, for some reason, in the makeup trailer. And it was your face, saying, ‘No, live.’ But it wasn’t your face, it was this, um, like, metallic cover of a robot trying to talk. I found it so disconcerning. Because it was your voice and yet this robot saying, you know? And it was just wrong. I thought, ‘you know, you just cannot replace human emotion and human feelings,’ because… (Lucy: Not yet.) Ugh, it was wrong.

Lucy      : Pretty soon we’re all out of a job.

Renee    : Well… I’ll go back to this show, then. And watch it again.

Lucy      : Yeah, yeah.

Xe_TV   : Don’t leave me. Don’t you leave me! Don’t leave me, don’t leave me! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!!! [Is There A Doctor In the House clip]

Gabrielle wakes up. [Is There A Doctor In the House clip]

Lucy      : I always get—yeah. That’s a wacky angle on you, wasn’t it? (Renee: Yeah.) Truest thing. It’s so sort of smooth and…

Renee    : I don’t know, I just seem so, um…

Lucy      : You really look unwell.

Renee    : Yeah.

Lucy      : Um… I remember that ‘cause as I’m hitting you I’m waiting for TJ to…

Renee    : Say that again.

Lucy      : As I’m hitting you I’m waiting for TJ to cue you to wake up. And he kept not cueing you. And this was quite some—I don’t know how many takes into it this was, but it was, like, over th—you’re just (Renee: Exhausting.) exhausted ‘cause it’s a very lo—it’s a long scene and we kept running it in its entirety. And, um, so you really do get that rush of… when you wake up…

Renee    : Like, ‘finally!’ Was he cueing me or was I taking my own cue?

Lucy      : Oh, maybe you were taking (Renee: I think I was taking my own cue!) your own cue! Oh my God, (Renee: ‘I’ll wait a little longer.’) when are you gonna wake up?!? Anyway it gives me—gave me a big rush then just watching it. And the music, you know? Swell, wasn’t it?

Renee    : Aw. The music was beautiful in all these different scenes, you know? Talkiing about really taking you back into time.

Lucy      : Yeah.

Meg in the mirror in Warrior…Princess…Tramp clip

Lucy      : It’s the Robert DeNiro…

Meg_TV : The name’s Zena. That’s Zena with a capital ‘Z’. [Warrior…Princess…Tramp clip]

Renee    : Did that come from, um, when they—

Lucy      : That was Josh. That was Josh’ saying (Renee: Oh, really?) that. That was his gag. That was a good one.

Renee    : Because, remember when, um, the show started, they didn’t wanna spell it with a ‘Z’?

Lucy      : I don’t—Maybe this is Mike Levine!

Renee    : I don’t remember. Probably Josh, though, actually. If he came up with that joke, it’s probably Josh. But, you know, because they wanted to say—call it Xena, but they didn’t want to spell it (Lucy: It’s definitely… it’s definitely Josh) with a ‘Z’ because a ‘Z’ is boring so they had to use an ‘X’. But now Meg got that wrong.

Lucy      : Right. Everybody gets that wrong. Yeah.

Renee    : Right.

Lucy      : Yeah. Even today, it’s written (Renee: Oh, really?) as a ‘Z’ all the time and then I know that that journalist hasn’t done any homework.

Renee    : He hasn’t seen the show?

Meg_TV : That can be arranged. [Warrior…Princess…Tramp clip]

Lucy      : They had such a good relationship, eh?

Renee    : Oh!!

Meg_TV : Eat some fruit, baby! [Warrior…Princess…Tramp clip]

Lucy      : Did you see?

Renee    : I do! This was definitely Josh. ‘Cause I remember him wanting to pull—how to pull the hair out. And I’m trying to place it.

Lucy      : I can’t even believe that I was mistaken this for being anybody else’s episode. (Renee: But Josh.) It’s totally Josh, yeah.

Renee    : Do you remember filming this scene?

Lucy      : I do actually.

Renee    : I know, that was fun.

Lucy      : ‘Cause I think—I think this was our first fight together (Renee: Definitely.) and you have to know... I mean, it was nice to feel that you could trust your colleague to do a fight without anybody getting hurt, (Renee: Right.) you know, and to pull that share of the weight, and—

Renee    : And to not get too involved or, yeah, to get into the character.

Lucy      : Yeah. To be, uh, a real cooperating.

Renee    : You could tell we were having too much fun.

Audio from Warrior…Princess…Tramp.

Lucy      : I love how Gabrielle keeps getting the best of her. That was a really fun relationship that’s rea—you know, um, sort of contr— (Renee: Control!) a lot of control on Gabrielle’s part…

Renee    : Yeah, finally she gets to control, it’s Meg, right?

Lucy      : And just total emnergy(?) from Meg.

Renee    : Mind you, Meg just despised Gabrielle, didn’t she? She—yeah.

Lucy      : Hated Gabrielle. Jealous. Really jealous.

Renee    : Oh, was that it?

Lucy      : Yeah.

Renee    : Oh, funny!

Lucy      : What’d she say? That was an outtake, wasn’t it?

Renee    : I think so.

Lucy      : Yeah.

Renee    : What episode is this?

Ren_TV  : Hope that I get her before Callisto does [Maternal Instincts outtake clip]

Lucy      : Is this with the warts on my face?

Renee    : Motherhood? Mother?

Lucy      : No.

Renee    : Maternity? Maternal Instincts.

Lucy      : Maternity *laughs*.

Renee    : Maternity *laughs*.

Ren_TV  : Lets just hope that—stop! Come on. I’m being serious, this is it. Let’s just hope that I—stop! [Maternal Instincts outtake clip]

Renee    : I can imagine the face you were pulling.

Lucy      : I’m not—I’m not doing anything. (Renee: Come on!) I’m just really enjoying you’re pain.

Renee    : Please! You would’ve been… you would’ve been doing one of your, um, like, um, (Lucy: No.) faces. Like your Meg faces. Yes, you were.

Lucy      : No. I promise you.

Renee    : Yeah, right.

Lucy      : I remember—‘cause I remember being surprised that you were blaming me, going, ‘stop!’

Renee    : Come on!

Lucy      : It’s never my fault.

Renee    : No! That’s funny ‘cause that didn’t happen very often with us. How fun was that? Happened with Ted all the time. (Lucy: Oh yeah. Ted sure did—) You and Ted, or me and Ted but not very often with us. We were so professional, that’s why.

Ren_TV  : You better stop! Jesus! Stop! Okay. God! And they’re gonna print this, I want you to know. [Maternal Instincts blooper clip]

Lucy      : ‘They’re gonna print this,’ and they did!

Ren_TV  : Don’t look at me, Lucy. Let’s just hope that I get her before Callisto does. [Maternal Instincts blooper clip]

Renee    : Ah! I almost made it to the door. Darn.

Lucy      : You looked back.

Xe_TV   : Terrific. Now can we head to Thessaly before you hurt yourself? [One Against An Army clip]

Gab_TV : No, no, no. No, wait. You see, I worked out the mechanics. The speed, trajectory, and finally the arc of the spin. [One Against An Army clip]

Xe_TV   : Good. [One Against An Army clip]

Renee    : Do you know where that came from?

Lucy      : Peter Bell!

Renee    : Peter Bell.

Lucy      : The stunt coordinator.

Renee    : Yeah. ‘Cause he would just have these little dolls (Lucy: Little—) he picked up?

Lucy      : Lego… Lego dolls. Yeah.

Renee    : Yeah. He would do—show exactly how you’re going to be doing the fight.

Lucy      : ‘You gotta do this, and you go biff-bang-boom, right like that. Somersault.’ Yeah.

Renee    : Yeah. So I did that—made that doll (Lucy: That’s cute.) as a tribute to him.

Lucy      : You’d—that’s beautiful.

Renee    : I went to—

Lucy      : You went to doll-making lessons.

Renee    : I did, (Lucy: That’s good.) I did indeed. In my free time.

Gab_TV : Basically I’d broken it down into relatively simple steps. [One Against An Army clip]

Xe_TV   : Oh yeah? What foot do I start on? [One Against An Army clip]

Gab_TV : Don’t confuse me. This time, no staff. [One Against An Army clip]

Renee    : You picked your teeth with my doll?

Lucy      : And you keep it close to your heart.

Renee    : Absolutely.

Xe_TV   : Gabrielle. Before I tried the flip without the staff, I made 300 attempts with it. [One Against An Army clip]

Gab_TV : Slow learner, huh, Xena? I had that problem with basket weaving. [One Against An Army clip]

Xe_TV   : It’s the right foot, but I’d rather you didn’t. [One Against An Army clip]

Gab_TV : It’s not like it’s gonna kill me. Let me try it one time. (Renee: No, but it—it might.) Okay? That’s what I need. One time. [One Against An Army clip]

Renee    : You know she’s doomed, huh?

Lucy      : Yeah. (R: You know something bad is going to happen.) You feel it coming.

Xe_TV   : Wrong foot. [One Against An Army clip]

Renee    : There you go.

Lucy      : Is this the episode where you really did have a bad leg?

Renee    : No, that was the, um, One Against An Army. That was the episode—

Lucy      : Oh, well that’s it! That’s it!

Renee    : This is One Against An Army?

Lucy      : Yeah.

Renee    : Huh… and you know what happened? How I sprained my ankle?

Lucy      : Oh, ‘cause that guy landed on you.

Renee    : Shane, yeah. Shane was doing a jump of a box and he was coming into frame and he landed on me. But then when he was actually doing the real stunt on a rig, coming through the ceiling, he broke his leg. Exact same move. So that—there were threes.

Lucy      : Something not to be about that.

Renee    : It’s cursed.

Audio from One Against An Army clip

Lucy      : They had a share of near death experiences, didn’t they?

Renee    : Absolutely.

Gab_TV : Teach me everything you know. [One Against An Army clip]

Lucy      : Awww. That is sad.

Gab_TV : You can’t leave me here in Potedeia. [One Against An Army clip]

Renee    : Potedeia!

Gab_TV : I wanna go with you. I’ve studied the stars, (Lucy: That’s right, it’s Potedeia, not Acidopholis. That was my town.) spoken with philosophers. (Renee: That’s right. Acidopholis) I have the gift of prophecy. I can be very valuable to you. Take me with you. I want so much to be like you. [One Against An Army clip]

Xe_TV   : And I wanna be like you. [One Against An Army clip]

Lucy      : Well, there you go. Um, Hugo the boom guy remarked me in, um, the fifth season how the same—whenever I do a tear up, the same eye would always (Renee: Really?) drop the first tear. I can’t remember. Let’s have a look.

Renee    : Isn’t it funny that he noticed that?

Lucy      : Yeah, ‘cause he’s always standing right there, you know?

Renee    : Right. And he and I always had a bit of a—(Renee: Oh.) Like, the second that they go cut I’m going *Lucy winks* to Hugo, you know? And he goes, ‘how do you do that?’ But, uh… so, that was our little gag.

Renee    : Isn’t it funny, that our—in the family, you know… our own Xena family.

Lucy      : Yeah. Um, yeah. So, anyway… okay. i can’t remember which one, but it’s always the same eye that drops the tear.

Renee    : That’s funny. I have to look for that. Next time.

Gabrielle strokes Xena’s hair after nightmare. [One Against An Army clip.]

Renee    : What a sad moment.

Lucy      : It’s sad. It’s pretty poignant. Very poignant.

Renee    : Uh-oh.

Lucy      : We didn’t talk about it, but… (Renee: I don’t remember much of that episode) how’d you feel to recap this?

Renee    : You know, I don’t remember…

Lucy      : I think ‘cause your leg was really hurting. And also…

Renee    : And there was that huge fight which was practically, you know…

Lucy      : Immense fight. Yeah.

Renee    : That was an entire act, so that must’ve been days that I wasn’t around.

Lucy      : And your scenes were all lumped together ‘cause you’re all (Renee: Right.) doing the lying down things. A lot of stuff we shot without you or with a double lying in the bed.